Macoun Apple Review
"The One-Night Stand"
The Macoun Apple (pronounced “Mc-cow-an” after Canadian horticulturist W.T. McCown – not “Mc-Coon”, which is basically a racial slur wrapped in a Happy Meal) is a fragile, purplish himbo that will blow you away for one magical night of ecstasy before dissipating into a slush-ball of regret the moment the sun comes up.
Developed in 1920s Upstate New York, this gaslighting flirt deceptively charms the unsuspecting and lonesome with its ultra-thin skin, complex berry-like flavor and solid crunch present when picked at peak freshness directly from a tree. But like a booty call that decides to stay for breakfast, any flicker of a notion at a long-term relationship is quickly dashed as this actually quite disgusting dirtbag turns into a mealy, tasteless flesh-sack within days of being brought home. And after two weeks…you are dealing with nothing but a repulsive bag of ass rooting around your fridge as you get ready for work.
- FLAVOR PROFILE -
MACOUN APPLE BIO
McIntosh x Jersey Black
Two Weeks In Fall
4 thoughts on “Macoun Apple Review”
You know, the moment I saw this review, I was highly offended. I’ve always touted Macouns as the best apple I’ve ever eaten, the apple to top all others. How could someone possibly think it’s only mediocre????
Then, I read your review.
See, I’ve only ever eaten Macouns I picked fresh from an orchard. You might actually have a point.
I looooove Macouns! But yeah, they’re in season for about a day and have to be eaten pretty much straight from the tree.
I love macouns(of course my dad called them mcoons). I also pick them fresh from the orchard. I do find that if I refrigerate them that they remain tolerable for a week and then loose crispiness and sweetness.
I tried a bag of Macouns. The flavor was ok, but there might have been something missing. And yes, after maybe 10 days in the fridge, they started to go bad.