pennsylvania

🏅 #5 RANKED SOUR APPLE

This salacious newcomer straight from the balls of apple scientists in sex-crazed Lancaster, Pennsylvania is a serviceable addition to what is becoming a crowded field of genetic freak, cross-bred apples. The “twist” is between the God-like Honeycrisp and bottom of the top list Pink Lady – an audacious combination that is the apple equivalent of a celebrity power couple.

But like most celebrity power couples, their less-hot offspring (while putting out a decent solo album) just can’t live up to their famous parents. Inheriting the hardness of the Pink Lady, and its unfortunate skin that lingers in your mouth like a wet paper bag, the Honeycrisp does the real heavy lifting, elevating this apple onto the bottom of the top list.

BONUS POINTS: +1 Branding